Wait, Is This the Biggest Self-Inflicted Problem?

Would you believe it if I told you that from where you stand today, you can take control of shaping your future on your terms?

More specifically, do you know that you can choose to overcome the exhaustion that might be gripping you due to the overfull plate of work, caring for family, being active in your community, worrying about the incessant stream of news that keep you on the edge, etc?

Well, you can. And, the solution is simple.

But, if it’s so simple then what gives…why aren’t more people energized by their life??

Generally speaking, we can attribute it to a bit of memory loss.

You see, most of us are so out of practice it almost never occurs to us that the power to be in the driver’s seat of running our own lives hinges on mastering how to do one thing — saying “no”.

Why most of us have difficulty saying “no”

For the most part, we’ve been socialized to be “nice” and “agreeable”. The consequence of this conditioning is we tend to ignore our needs in order to fit in, for validations, etc.

This eventually leads to us running on empty and other frustrations resulting from our boundaries being stomped all over.
When not put in check this then manifests into dis-ease…mentally, physically, emotionally and the downward spiral begins.

From this space of survival, growth, joy, optimism become impossible.

Therefore, the inability to say “no” is at the root of our most self-inflicted problems — exhaustion and burnout.

Having this awareness is very important as it allows us to be kind to ourselves as we relearn and get in the habit of saying “no” to the things we simply don’t want.

How to say “no” like a two year old

Starting right now, simply practice saying “no”, kind of like a two year old child. Everything for them is a no until convinced otherwise, except in this case you’d be convincing yourself why something isn’t a good use of your time or energy.

And, don’t just say no. Really challenge yourself by taking it a step further and use language that effectively conveys what you’re not willing to do without having to justify it with a million reasons.

For example, change “I can’t do xyz” to “I don’t do xyz”. The latter enables you to own your power and communicates a clear line that’s not to be crossed.

This all becomes simpler when we understand that our purpose in life is to self realize…not to people please. That’s the mantra to repeat when we’re worried about how someone might respond to us saying “no”.

Now, what to do with all the time you’re going to have left once you get into the habit of doing this?

  1. Get sufficient sleep
  2. Move your most important projects forward
  3. Enjoy “me” time or spend it with those who feed your soul and replenish so you can come back strong where it matters

Get in practice of doing this and watch how even the people around you rise up to meet your boundaries. Those are the type to keep in your corner and the energy that’ll propel you to your next level.

P.s., Live #liferich!